by Sabrina Cohen
OLD SCHOOL RULES
Back in the day (the olden days, not 1995), dating was relatively simple; people met, married, bore children, and died—for many, all this before age 30. Up until the mid-twentieth century there were clearly defined (albeit unspoken) rules, and just about everyone followed them. But as our freedoms increased, so did our options. Dating these days is a free love free-for-all, based on nothing more personal preference.
Without having “rules” or standard practices to go by, dating can be a minefield of mixed messages. Every person speaks his or her own dating language, leaving everyone else lost in translation. This could explain why dating is so damn confusing these days, and why after a while, everyone out there seems crazy.
NEW RULES = NO RULES
With no set rules to play by, we have no choice but to follow our instincts. Setting aside contrived signals, logic, and reasoning, we instead focus on the natural chemistry that exists (or doesn’t). We learn to be guided by our experience as opposed to our thoughts about what “should” be. We also learn to just be instead of being stuck in evaluation mode all the time.
It may seem to have been easier back then, but there’s something refreshingly simplistic about relying on our hearts and not our heads for a change. And perhaps the unpredictability of it all may actually make it easier for daters today to spot the right thing when it comes along.
So, how you navigate the uncertainty? Follow today’s golden rule of dating: Lead with your heart, follow your gut.
Do you fancy yourself a modernist or do you prefer the dating traditions of generations past?
Sabrina Cohen is a blogger, copywriter, and creative consultant for MarketSmiths.com.