The Spin: How to Silence Your Cynical Self

by Sabrina Cohen

In the wake of undesirable dating experiences, we often punish ourselves with cynical thoughts, emotions, and conversations—including with ourselves. While we can’t control outside factors, we can control our reactions, and bounce back stronger than ever.

Language dictates attitudes, and attitude dictates behavior. Discouragement and cynicism breed bitterness, and no one finds that attractive. With awareness, we can choose a reaction that’s healthy as opposed to one that will perpetuate more of the same. Review the following examples and notice the power perception plays in how we interpret situations. The next time it all goes to hell, silence your cynical self by practicing the spin.


1) Your recent dates have been a barrage of dysfunction.

The cynic: Are there any normal women/men out there?!!

The spin: I’m so ready to meet someone grounded like me.


2) All of your friends are coupled up and you’re noticeably single.

The cynic: I must be the only one alone for a reason.

The spin: The right person is worth waiting for.


3) Your last breakup had you reeling in heartbreak.

The cynic: I’d rather be alone than risk being hurt.

The spin:  I’m open to finding someone, but I’ll focus on myself till then.


4) Your last significant other resented how much time you spent on work.

The cynic: I have to choose between a career and a love life.

The spin: I can have it all! The right person will appreciate my ambition.


How do you bounce back from bad dating experiences? Share with us below!

Sabrina Cohen is a blogger, copywriter, and creative consultant for






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