How Much Should You Dish About Your Date?

By Natasha Burton

After a meet-up, you might be tempted to spill all the details about how it went. But there are certain things you might not want to reveal to your girlfriends just yet. Here’s the stuff you should keep close to the chest.

1. Anything your intro might of done or said that could seem weird to someone who just met him

There is never a need to tell your friends every single detail of your first date. Not only will it bore your pals to tears, it also creates a situation where you’re analyzing things just because there is nothing really to talk about. Besides, on a first meet-up your intro might not really be acting like himself: His over-enthusiasm for anime or his tendency to annoyingly peel the labels off his beer bottles might be nerves at work, not bonafide weirdness. The more you read too far into the things like this, the more your friends will just to keep the conversation going, which can cause you to collectively create a red flag out of nothing.

2. Every single text he sends you 

Look, you don’t need a committee to figure out what his “hey” means unless you are in 7th grade. And you certainly don’t need your pals to approve the texts you send back. At this stage in the relationship — you know, when there isn’t yet a relationship — it’s best to communicate one-on-one then make your correspondence a group effort.

3. Details about his childhood or past

Depending on how deep you get on a first date, you and your intro may start sharing some private anecdotes from your lives. Unless there is something truly disturbing that you need to get a second opinion on before you can feel comfortable going out with the guy again (which might in itself be a sign that maybe you shouldn’t go out with him again), you should keep anything personal he told you during the date to yourself. Staying mum is the courteous thing to do — it also prevents putting your friends in an awkward situation if you decide to introduce them to the guy in the future and they accidentally mention something he said to you in confidence early on.

4. Unflattering stories about mutual friends

Perhaps you realize during your meet-up that you and your intro know some of the same people. And perhaps you both have some unsavory stories about these individuals. As tempting as it might be, do not spread any gossip that the guy might have shared with you in confidence to your social circle. Not only will it show him that he can’t trust you, the deets could get to the wrong people and end up putting him in a bad situation with his own friends. When it doubt, just keep it on the DL.

5. Your iffy feelings on whether or not you want to go on another date

If you’re not sure how you feel about an intro after your first meet-up, try to refrain from going to your pals for answers. They may feel compelled to give an opinion or make a snap judgement based on the details you’ve told them, which will only skew your own feelings further. It never hurts to go on a second date to get to know the guy better to see for yourself if you think he could be long-term material.


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Filed under Date Etiquette, Dating Tips

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